[ There is something to admire in how relentless Sunday is. Were Aventurine not on guard for the moment when the bird decides to reach into his mind and move things into a more pleasing shape again, he might be more forthcoming about how charming he finds Sunday's willingness to square up to any challenge. As it stands, though, he only stares back, unflinching, fearing any sign of weakness might provide an opening. ]
You should think more of your own comfort and worry less about what I'm feeling. [ He shoves his hands into his pockets. ] No one is going to pay you the same courtesy out here.
[ Outside of the Sweet Dream, he means. Even on Penacony, where Sunday was more than a king, the people surrounding him had been manipulative -- well, all of them save his sister. It is no different out here. The sooner he learns that, the better.
Just as soon as he commits to the thought, though, he rolls his shoulders and gives a heavy sigh. Honesty. It's the only way. Any lies will stack up, higher and higher, until they all eventually topple, and the two of them don't even have the foundation to fake a house of cards. ]
Your hands are fine. It was just... a surprise. I don't exactly have a lot of experience with clergy. Aren't you sacred or something? I doubt you want someone like me looking at you, and- [ A huff. ] It's- it's really just, you don't want to be comforted, I can tell. And even if you did, I don't know how to do it. It seemed more effective to keep moving. [ When in doubt, maximize productivity. Focus on goals. ] Alright?
[Sunday's eyes widen and he finds himself mutely staring at Aventurine for the second time in less than an hour.]
...Mister Aventurine, I am not asking for comfort, nor am I acting out of concern for the comfort of strangers-- [At the moment anyway. He has acted out of concern for strangers many times. His life's work, the one thing he has made his core ambition, his entire reason to keep living, is to ensure the happiness of people he will never meet. His wings fold back, and he casts his gaze demurely toward the floor.]
Not just now, anyway. [He looks back up, his eyes sharper now.] I am asking out of concern for your comfort. If we are going to travel together, it makes sense to be aware of each other's emotional states. If I am incorrect about that, please let me know.
[There was one more point, one more absurd thing Aventurine said that should be addressed.] And I am stripped of my blessings now. My body is no more sacrosanct than yours. You are permitted to gaze upon me. It is leering I dislike. If I catch you doing that, I will castigate you.
[ Cruelty would be so much easier to navigate and contempt more familiar to manage, but no, of course it must be more complicated than that. Of course Sunday would be the man Robin sees, unyielding, untrusting, but compassionate, paving that road to hell with overwhelmingly good intentions. How exhausting. Aventurine would almost prefer if the former priest still saw him as an evil spirit in need of exorcising. As it stands, he can't even feel satisfaction in taking advantage of kindness offered by a former enemy. Not when it feels like he's one of the sinful flock, now. Ick.
He pinches the bridge of his nose, barely registers Sunday's words until he starts speaking about gazes and leering. Aventurine blinks, hand falling to his side. There is the terrifying maestro who'd holed himself up in that oppressive little office in Dewlight Pavilion. Looking at him, Aventurine isn't sure what he feels -- fear, maybe, a jolt of something, certainly -- but what slips out of him is a snicker. His brows beetle, grin returning to his face. ]
Permitted to...? Spare the rod, Mister Sunday. You don't need to worry about me leering. Good instinct, though.
[ Aventurine can barely look at him -- fine features hidden behind the fluff of his hair, too expressive feathers always moving and giving him away -- without getting annoyed. All the same, he files that information away for later. Even without the halo, Sunday is jarringly handsome, and the ogling eyes of strangers will be unavoidable as they hop from world to world. Aventurine will have his work cut out for him, keeping unwanted attention at bay.
But, first things first. ]
Kind as it is for you to be so fussed with my comfort, right now, you're the one whose whole world has been turned upside down. [ Nevermind that he is still on leave, recovering from Harmony's brand, an Emanator's blade, and a walk through Nihility's sea. ] You don't trust me. That's to be expected. But it does complicate your concerns, you not believing half the things I say.
I'm not used to living in close quarters with someone else, let alone someone with our... shared history. It'll take some adjusting. There'll be plenty of little inconveniences. But, I... [ He doesn't quite wince, but a heaviness settles in his gaze as he stares into Sunday's face. The lines he's drawn between himself and Sunday are starting to take a more definitive shape. It feels like an elephant huddled in the back of his mind. A good thing Aventurine is good at ignoring things like that. ] ...setting aside the little things, I just don't want to see you shrink down, take up as little space as possible, and erase yourself because you think it'll make our lives easier. Okay?
[One wing twitches back slightly as he listens. Avnturine speaks evenly, cautiously, as if Sunday truly is a terrible lion of nightmares who may pounce at the slightest insult. At the end, the lion laughs. Is he really such a monster?]
The rod? Oh, Mister Aventurine, I would never resort to such barbaric methods of retribution. More likely, I would tune you so that you never see again.
[The notes of laughter in his voice fade quickly, but remain in his eyes. His expression is amused, not mocking.] ....If you are sure you don't want me to keep to myself, then I won't. However, I think it would be in both of our interests to establish some boundaries when we return to the ship. For example, I know the door to your bed chamber is a threshold I must never cross. I would appreciate it if you returned the favor. We wouldn't want you coming down my ladder unannounced after all. What if you saw me without my boots on? You might catch a glimpse of my ankle.
[ Sunday is laughing. Aventurine focuses on that, on the smile that lingers in his eyes even after the sound stops. It is a jest. Mostly a jest. Probably a jest. No cause for concern. He smiles through it, his characteristic sly grin holding steady, the only sign of discomfort an impatient, busy flex of his fingers.
Though tuning is a threat Aventurine cannot take lightly, Sunday has allowed himself to be more than an inconvenience, stronger than the meek, injured animal. It is too great a victory to let his own nonsense ruin things. If they are to spend weeks together, better a companion unafraid to show his true colors than one who pretends to be nothing at all. Aventurine knows how that sort of thing usually goes. ]
Well, much as I love consequences for my actions, I'd hate to disrupt my poker game, so I better be on my best behavior.
[ He manages a laugh, easy, warm sound. ]
Most wise of you, Mister Sunday. Could you imagine if I walked in on you preening your feathers? I might faint, then we'd be in real trouble. [ Aventurine fishes a card out of his pocket and offers it out. ] Consider the room below deck your domain until I get you where you need to go. Take this, buy whatever feels right for an eclectic journey. I'm going to go get us a couple of coffees.
I did survive decades before I met you, Mister Aventurine. [Sunday says, the smile still evident in his voice as he accepts the card.]
I'll be fine.
...I prefer my coffee [with heavy cream, plenty of sugar] black. [The Oak Family Head does not indulge in sweets. Even clipped of his wings, Sunday finds some old habits hard to shake.
Once he is left alone, Sunday wanders around the shop and other nearby storefronts, perusing clothes and travel sacks. He selects silk sleepwear, the one with too much chest exposed for his liking, and a fluffy bathrobe with matching slippers to cover himself with. In a store with cold-weather wear, he purchases a sleek, fur-lined coat that hangs to his ankles and complements his frame. White, with blue trim. Everything he buys is stylish. After all, necessity doesn't mean he can't look his best.
Warm weather clothing is more difficult for him. Shirts show much more skin than he is accustomed to. After some fussing, he finally settles on a short-sleeved top and loose linen trousers.
By the time Aventurine returns, he is standing on the side of the road, gripping multiple overstuffed bags. A few passersby give him lingering glances that he mistakes for ogling at first, then he realizes he must look like a wealthy tourist preparing for a pan-galactic cruise.]
[ The look Aventurine levels at Sunday before parting is incredulous, teasing.
He takes his time, stopping at open air stalls they'd passed to browse wares and clear his head. It's a relief, he decides, that Sunday seems to be finding his footing. In lieu of something more cleanly cruel and monstrous, Aventurine will gladly take a bit of fire. Even if it does scare him more than the shrinking, injured bird he's been traveling with for the last day, poking a bear feels better than walking on eggshells. More real. (Not that he has any business wanting authenticity from anyone.)
It's a simple thing, popping into the music shop and procuring the violin. The merchant (husband of the woman who crafts most of the wooden pieces) recognizes him from their earlier stop. He clearly expects Aventurine to haggle, but he doesn't. However fine the instrument, the dent it puts in his bank account could be hammered out in one night at the right card table. He is, instead, generous with praise for the craftsmanship while the shopkeeper retrieves the piece and packs it into its case and wraps it all in brown paper, and laughs off a comment about the handsome young man he'd been by with earlier being "one lucky guy."
Next, the coffees. He orders from a spot he'd come to the first time he'd been to Lushaka. Back then, he'd been new to the Stonehearts, only recently inducted and unsure of how to behave himself in polite society. The little shop with the walk up window had been a reprieve. Still nicer than anything he'd ever experienced as a pit fighter, but a little more grounded in reality. The coffee is strong. The pastries better for being made in house. Aventurine purchases two cream puffs to go along with the two black coffees, and leisurely makes his way back, enjoying the feel of real sunlight baking his skin. (The bird probably needs sunscreen, he thinks off-handedly, when he notices what a warm day it is.)
When Sunday comes into view again, arms laden with bags from the shopping district's designer stores, Aventurine can't help but laugh. A bright bark of sound that he can't quite stifle with his own hands full. ]
I guess you really don't need my help to spend money.
[ He does a bit of juggling as he sidles up beside Sunday, large nondescript bag with the violin hoisted up onto one shoulder, coffees in carrier and pastries in paper sack moved over to one hand. He extends the other, open, to Sunday.
The delight at the sight of Sunday's many purchases is plain in his voice. ]
Slide some of those on my arm so you can take your drink, Mister Shopping Spree. Got us some pastries, too. The coffee's real strong, so I wanted something to balance it. Would you like to eat here on deck, or head back to my ship?
[Sunday glides forward, as effortlessly elegant in his movements as the birds wheeling overhead.]
The deck [He answers as he shifts the loops of his bags over Aventurine's arm. His now free hand accepts the coffee and he steps back with a grin that, this time, fails to reach his eyes.]
I would not mind looking out at the sea before we depart.
[ Though he does not outwardly react, Aventurine takes note of the half-fueled smile right away. Faking joy, pretending at comfort, feigning satisfaction, those had been the first things he'd learned once his life was more than just basic survival. Sunday will need to learn the same, but Aventurine finds himself in no rush to teach him.
He hoists the bags up onto his other shoulder and leads the way toward a spot he recalls being a fine place to sit and enjoy the scenery. They needn't walk far to find the intended destination -- the Hammer is dotted with little patches of green overlooking the endless blue. He brings them to a bench, wood planks set in carved coral overlooking the ocean, and shrugs the bags on his arm off onto the ground. ]
No one gave you too much fuss?
[ It's the closest he'll come to asking what's wrong outright. ]
[Sunday doesn't sit at first. He walks a few steps forward and gazes out at the waves, his expression distant and his wings tense.]
I'm fine. [He looks back at Aventurine with a sad smile.] I've read about oceans before, but I have never seen one. Now I am realizing there is so much I haven't seen.
[Once again, his gaze is pulled to the water. A horrible impulse stabs through him to run and leap from the side of the Hammer. It would correct many things that are currently wrong in the world. Since his sister, the Nameless, and even the IPC refuse to execute the greatest sinner of all, he could take on the burden himself. The Family has executed many sinners and heretics over the years in many ways. Drowning would do. In the black beneath the waves, everything would cease to matter, a major pawn would be removed from the game board of the Aeons, and the universe could wind on as if the creature named Sunday never existed.
It is a sweet, almost intoxicating thought. He hates himself now more than he has ever hated anyone. His own life feels like a terrible burden, a beautiful prize for sin that he doesn't deserve but must accept. ...And he wants to accept it. He wants to live. Despite everything, despite the immorality in his soul, he wants to live. Not just survive but one day truly live. That wish is exhilarating and terrifying.]
I want to live, Mister Aventurine. [He says softly.] I want to see more horizons like this one.
[Then, turning back to Aventurine, his grin warms and softens.]
On THEIR journey backward through time, Finality moved on either side of us and brought us together. I admit, I am not sure why, but... I think, even though I am afraid, I am excited...
[Maybe there has always been an ember within him, one he'd smothered throughout his adolescence, that looked skyward with longing.]
[ Ah, so the only one giving him any fuss is himself. That's not too surprising. The bird does seem to like making a cage of his own mind; a cage with a door that not even his own sister could fling open without the help of a thousand other souls. More, even. Sunday really is unspeakably dangerous, but then, isn't that the hallmark of the Nameless?
Aventurine watches, wordless, as it happens. He thinks he can almost see the moment of epiphany. Sunday takes in the planet-spanning sea that surrounds them, finally puts himself in the moment and sees the specific sort of freedom that's stretched out before him. Robin was right. Penacony's fallen king was stymied by his throne, diverted from a chance at a better Path. Trailblaze does not exactly set Aventurine at ease. He cannot look at those who wander without a touch of jealousy and a heap of fear, but at least he knows now that Akivili's blessed aren't all cold, hungry conquerors.
Which sort will Sunday be in the end?
He supposes it doesn't matter. His own fears aside, so long as he can deliver the bird to the Express, it'll be better for everyone. He's mulling over their options when Sunday turns and bathes him in a sunrise smile he isn't quite prepared for and talk of Terminus and shared destinies. Aventurine stares back, surprise flickering across his features, something jolting beneath his sternum, pulling his attention to the brown paper bag in his hands. ]
I don't know much about the goals or motivations of destiny...
[ Taking care not to get any powdered sugar on his gloves or clothes, Aventurine retrieves one of the puff pastries wrapped in wax paper and a napkin. His eyes linger on the cream puff, unable to bear the combined weight Sunday's bright new hope and his ridiculous, romantic notions about fate. Fate never orchestrates things with kindness in mind.
Someone like Robin, like the Express crew, like a damned Masked Fool would've been better for Sunday in this moment. Anyone but him, incapable of looking ahead and seeing anything but an end point, revenge and then death.
His eyes flick up from the pastry in his hand to settle on Sunday. Sunday, who believes in paradise, who seems finally willing to let go enough to chase it. Stars, he's going to need all the help he can get. And sunscreen. Aventurine reminds himself to buy him some sunscreen. ]
I can promise you plenty of horizons, though, and time enough to see them.
[ Not moving from his spot on the bench, he holds out the cream puff. ]
[Sunday glides back to the bench, sits, and takes a sip of the coffee. Bitter. He drinks anyway.]
On Penacony, I wanted to gather all Paths into myself and crush them into nothingness. Over their ruins I would have built my Path of Philosophy, a Path created by and for humankind...
[His eyes skirt downward and he lifts a hand to rest against his heart.]
As King of Humankind, as their scorching sun, I would have taken on the burden of choice and maintained paradise alone until the end of the cosmos. It...would have been beautiful.
[A glorious, golden world of peace and harmony, where the weak are cared for. His paradise. His promised land. A world he will mourn until the day he finally dies.
With a steadying breath, Sunday closes his eyes, then says...]
But... I don't think a worldbearer is what humanity wants. I think, maybe, they want a world traveler. Someone who can meet them as one of them, share their pain, and guide them to happiness. If I want to be that person, then I need wisdom, knowledge, and experience. Ascetism alone will not be enough.
[Finally, he lowers his hand from his chest and opens his eyes to meet Aventurine's gaze.]
I must see those distant horizons and unfamiliar stars... [He laughs slightly and plucks the offered cream puff from Aventurine's hand.]
Ah, oops. I'm rambling again. Forgive me, I've been thinking a lot. The sea helps...put matters into perspective. I am finally understanding some things that have been bothering me since my fall.
[ Sunday still speaks with such conviction, still holds ideals that a number of people went to great lengths to prove were misplaced. Someone should probably hammer those thoughts out of him, but oddly, they don't bother Aventurine all that much. Calculation and control are things Aventurine understands well, and he, himself, holds little love for the Aeons past the benefits that can be reaped from working in their service. Sunday's perfect universe makes sense in a way; Aventurine wouldn't call it a paradise, himself -- it would be anything but for most people -- but he can see where such a vision would appeal to the person hoisting the whole of everything upon their shoulders.
But blessedly, he needn't pretend to be staunchly against the whole thing. Sunday has glimpsed the truth of things, or at least a piece of it. There's more to go, certainly, learning of humanity's penchant for sadness, for anger, for obstinance, for making no sense at all, but he's taking his first steps. (And Aventurine is thankful for that, because disagreeing with the man still feels a little like carrying a lit match into an abandoned mine.)
If anything, the surprise is in seeing him already committed to making the leap. ]
Wow. [ Aventurine leans back, crosses one leg over the other, and takes a sip of still hot coffee. He stares out at the water a moment before looking at Sunday once more, offering an impish grin. ] A risky endeavor, Mister Sunday. I'm impressed. Not surprised, but impressed.
[ Another drink, he drapes one arm over the back of the bench, away from Sunday. ]
I knew you had it in you.
[ The moment Robin tangled the two of them in the IPC's web, he'd known. She wouldn't've sent her brother out into a universe he could not handle. Sunday is more than the stone mannequins dotting Penacony's Grand Theater, not shattered by a fall. ]
You're going to grow callouses as you walk. Just remember not to let it all go rough. That perspective isn't the last one you'll gain. People are difficult and unpredictable. They teach you a lot. That's why they're fun.
[Sunday lifts the cream puff to his lips and reflexively folds his wings forward against his cheeks to block Aventurine's view of his chewing.]
Difficult and unpredictable? [How strange to be told this after his many years as Bronze Melodia. This observation is why he had wanted to force predictability upon people, to grab them by the hand and pull them along his Path. What he'll need to learn isn't that such people exist, but how to guide them gently. How to show them happiness and encourage them to walk toward it on their own.
His wings flutter.]
Maybe traveling with the Aventurine of Strategems will teach me more about that. [In all the world, he cannot think of a single soul more frustrating than Aventurine. Fascinating and admirable. But also incredibly frustrating.]
[ Hard to believe that a man who worries about the propriety of being seen eating is capable of the ruthlessness and subterfuge Aventurine had seen -- had experienced first hand -- on Penacony. Aventurine watches as Sunday takes his first bite, wings curling around to hide his face, like some fine high fashion winter collar.
It's very silly. The bird is very silly. And he can't help but grin about it, right up until he recalls the decree about leering, ogling, and other lascivious behavior, and looks away to avoid his amusement being misinterpreted.
Aventurine focuses on the other tourists strolling through the park, starts to brainstorm the to-do list he'll need to address when they're back on the ship -- hide the violin, report to Jade, announce Sunday's intention to stay on the move until the Express reemerges, get that bed set up, sleep for an hour or two, maybe, and then-
Sunday's words reach him, and he laughs. ]
Jumping right in to hard mode, huh, Mister Sunday? You must really think yourself lucky.
[ Aventurine points a delighted grin at the man who, weeks ago, wanted him dead or worse. He cannot help but think of Harmony's brand, that unnecessary bit of extra, final justice imposed on him. Being the focus of Sunday's attention is more than a little terrifying, but then again, what would he even find, given the time to ferret up Aventurine's secrets?
Nothing. There's nothing. That's the whole point.
An amused sigh escapes him, and he takes another drink. ]
I hope you like what you find, Mister Sunday. And even if not, there are at least no end to lovely horizons out there. Enjoying the pastry?
[Sunday eats in silence, aware of Aventurine seated beside him, watching tourists wander through the park with their bags and sun hats. Pointedly watching them, he realizes.]
You are permitted to look at me. [Sunday reminds him with a warm chuckle.] Believe it or not, I do know when someone is leering instead of looking.
[It is a difficult thing to explain, but he recognizes it when it happens. On Penacony, most people stared. Tourists from afar usually hadn't met a Halovian before. Some ogled him, eyes dark with sinful lust. Some saw him as a work of art. Most were simply awestruck by his beauty. The artists were strange, but rarely immoral with their gazes. Even when they compared him to a statue, an objectifying comparison to make, they did so with rhapsodic praise. To them, he was not someone to be wooed, but a beauty to be honored. It was not ogling.
This isn't either.
Aventurine has only looked at him with eager curiosity so far, watching him and studying him, in an attempt to understand and predict his behavior. He's never felt anything lecherous in the Stoneheart's eyes. Maybe Aventurine understands. With his history, he must know what it is like to be stared at in a way that makes one feel like an object, a commodity. Less than human.
Sunday finishes the cream puff, washes it down with a sip of coffee, then turns his head to return the grin.]
Thank you. The pastry was quite good.
...Once you are done with your drink, we can return to your ship. Unless you had something else you needed to do here on Lushaka?
[ It seems, for the moment, that the lion is sated. He'll see how it goes when they are in close quarters, again. A tin can floating in the sea of stars is much less soothing than sunshine on an endless sea. Aventurine takes another drink, sinking a little into his seat, giving himself permission to enjoy a much needed hit of caffeine while relaxing muscles that have been tensed for hours. ]
Sounds like a plan. Since we already know the Express isn't headed this way, there're better places to be.
[ Relaxed as he seems, his mind is abuzz with work. There's a whole brigade of P25s here, eager to impress someone of his rank, who could be recruited to keep tabs on the comings and goings of Family on the Hammer's Reef, but that might be too obvious. He considers erasing their docking data entirely before they leave, though falsifying records at this juncture feels like too great a risk for comparatively small reward. Best, then, to pretend nothing was odd about this visit. Just let Lushaka be what it is, a pitstop on the way to a greater journey.
The only question left is, what next?
Another drink. ]
Where would you like to go, Mister Sunday? Somewhere snowy? Plains or mountains? Civilized or remote?
[Don't leave it up to me, he wants to say. He's never been good at making choices for himself. Others are easy. From his position as an onlooker, he can see the paths others walk clearly, can see the obstacles they will face, and where the forks and bends appear. The Bronze Melodia, however, walks an empty path alone. He has no real past, no real future. He is only the vessel for the wishes of others.
But he is not Bronze Melodia anymore, and he should get used to having preferences about things...and learning what those preferences are. Thinking about it always feels too overwhelming. Even without his wings, it helps to frame his future as a divine mission. A divine mission he can handle. Learning more about the man he sees in the mirror, however...]
Well, any of those places could be an important stop on my pilgrimage. [On civilized planets, he learns to understand the people, on remote ones, he learns suffering. After the warm light of Lushaka, maybe the snow would be best.]
...I have not seen the snow. I think it would help to know what people in frozen climates endure. [His smiling expression darkens as he tries not to think about the discomfort he will face, and how much he deserves it.]
[ What a relief he didn't suggest deserts or rain-soaked plains. Not that Sunday seems like the sort to have a dream list of specific lands he longs to visit, but Aventurine still struggles to disembark when work calls him to worlds of parched earth and storms. The less said about it the better. And anyway, the Express is better suited to bearing Sunday to those sorts of stars, anyway.
Snow, though, he can do snow.
In silence, he watches the point where Lushaka's glittering blue welcomes the clear, pale sky. A pall has settled over Sunday's demeanor, again. Aventurine takes another long drink of coffee before he addresses int. ]
What makes them happy.
[ A light amendment, stated softly. He turns in his seat, angles his whole body toward Sunday. ]
Wherever you go, you're going to find pain and hardship. You're going to see suffering. And you're going to see it straight away. You, specifically, I mean, not a generic "you." You're sensitive to that sort of thing, right?
People thrive in those places, too, though. There's joy and faith and love, even in the roughest frontier. If you're going to peddle happiness...
[ Aventurine fishes his own cream puff out of the bag, holding it daintily between his fingers, still mindful of the powdered sugar. ]
...You need to learn what makes the people happy. Not just what they endure.
[ He pops the cream puff into his mouth, one bite, no reservations about seeming crass. The powdered sugar shaken loose is quickly attended to, though, patted off with a napkin right away while he chews. ]
[Some of the warmth returns to his face as he gazes out at the sea to watch the birds loop and dive from the sky into the waves.]
I need to learn what makes the hardships worth enduring.
[Because there must be something. Beneath the struggle, the aching grind of life is a spark that drives people forward. On Penacony, that spark was lost long ago, consumed by the Stellaron. He wants to see that spark.
He wants to believe in the strength of human will as much as the Nameless do.
His silver wings fold back as he chuckles.]
You are wiser than you are given credit for, Mister Aventurine.
[Finally, he lifts his head to regard his companion, and the warm smile dissolves at the sight of an entire cream puff disappearing in one bite.]
[ Mouth still full, Aventurine gives a noncommittal hrmph in acknowledgement of Sunday's compliment. He doesn't agree. The mistrust is usually well-placed. He is not half as well-read or worldly as those he works with, just an infernally lucky soul who can't seem to find the fall he deserves.
He doesn't have time to feel any particular way about that, though. Sunday's expression blanks at the sight of him, chipmunk-cheeked, devouring a pastry, and he barely has time enough to cover his mouth before he starts laughing. Of course Sunday, gifted all the time in the world to be as Orderly as possible, is not prepared for the eating habits of a corporate drone. Oh, he is in for such a rude awakening.
Just in time, Aventurine presses his forearm to his face, catching a laugh, sealing his mouth and nose as he almost chokes on cream and sugar. The bright sound threatening to spill out thrums deep in his chest and high in his throat, instead, a humming, violin sound as he swallows laughter and tries not to cough.
He lets his stifled giggles peter out before he finishes chewing, and does not speak until he's swallowed the pastry. ]
Sorry to make you regret that very nice compliment so quickly, Feathers. [ Aventurine wheezes, delight plain, before he takes a swig of still hot coffee. He smiles, though, big and bright. His cup is nearly empty, so he scoops up a few of the bags he'd set down on the bench beside him and stands. ] Let's head back, before you really start to regret your choice in chauffeur.
[Sunday follows Aventurine to his feet and takes one last delicate sip of coffee. His heart is racing for reasons that have nothing to do with the caffeine but, he realizes, surprised, he is not as afraid as he thought he would be.
A long journey awaits him, and he is eager to see what happens next. If he can push past the anxious knot he feels whenever he thinks about his lack of control, this journey could be fun.
Fun... as long as he keeps one step ahead of The Family. If they don't kill him for his heresy, they will use him to hurt Robin. He knows what powerful tuners can do. None of his thoughts would be safe. She wouldn't be safe. Aventurine wouldn't be safe.
The excitement of a journey sinks beneath a whirl of anxiety. His mind latches onto the worry as something familiar, a lifeline in the confusing world he finds himself in, and his wings tense.
He draws a breath, prepares himself to ask if Aventurine is prepared to kill him to keep him out of The Family's hands.
Why are you constantly fantasizing about this man killing you? he inwardly scolds himself. What is your problem?
Stop it!
Sunday releases the tension in a shuddered sigh and smiles.]
If I have regrets, they will not be because of you, Mister Aventurine.... That said, yes, let's return to the ship.
[ Travel jitters. Had he felt those the night he and Lady Jade killed Kakavasha and forged a new Aventurine? He can't recall. Mostly, he remembers how little anything had changed. Shackles traded for bangles, a sack cloth shirt replaced with a fine new uniform, a new master to replace the dead one, and all of his anger, all of his fear and shame, still totally intact. It was, he supposes, both absolutely singular and too much to actually process.
Aventurine's gaze lingers on Sunday's once more, expression betraying nothing. Reductive, to call it travel jitters. All the same, he's not sure there's any good way of addressing it, so he gathers up bags onto his arms and leads the way back the way they'd come, through the Hammer's market district and the IPC's main office.
He makes light conversation to fill silence and avoid thinking about regret and distress, mostly about local landmarks or how he understands Lushakan city ships function, as they load up the sleek black shuttle and disembark. A perhaps surprisingly small package is waiting for them when they return to the ship, a sturdy little crate, no bigger than a family-sized pizza delivery, is anchored to the cargo door. Aventurine pushes a few buttons to open the ship's hatch, and the package rockets itself inside. The shuttle follows in after it, settling into place in silence. ]
That's going to be heavier than it looks. [ He says, meaning the space delivery. ] A whole mattress, pillows, blankets, everything, vacuum-sealed down to a carryable size. Let me help you get it down into your room.
[ Odd, to call it his room. Aventurine's fingers linger a moment on his safety harness before unhooking it. No, not odd. Just a calculated move to make the bird feel more comfortable in his temporary quarters.
The shuttle opens once the cargo bay is sealed. Aventurine does not rush to climb out this time. ]
Last thing we need is you throwing your back out, right? First, though, I'd like to plot a course to our next stop. We're better off not hanging out too long in the place everyone thinks the Express was going.
[Abandoning control has not become any easier. Sunday sits quietly in the passenger seat throughout their trip, feathers twitching from a deep effort not to think, to just let events carry him where they may. Even if it means surrendering his fate to Aventurine. The passenger seat, he realizes, is slowly turning into a metaphor for his life.
It is difficult to accept, almost impossible, no matter how hard he tries to still his mind.
When the shuttle stops in the cargo bay, he is the one who rushes to climb out. Maybe a quick stretch and a comfortable flex of his wings will quiet the worried spiral he's been in since sitting on the bench in Lushaka. That brief moment of joyous excitement at the thought of a journey had been fun before his own anxious nature brought it crashing down and forced it into a more painful but familiar and easily understood shape.
It takes a moment for him to notice Aventurine is speaking. He glances over after another pretty stretch and flutters his wings.]
Where will our next stop be? Snowland? Jarilo-Six? I heard the Nameless stopped there already so I doubt anyone suspects they'll show up there again.
[ A poised and silent statue the whole ride back, then he springs up like someone with a stringent fitness routine. Aventurine only watches, wondering at how he's found himself with the only other person, besides himself, in the interastral alliance as dedicated to performance as a Masked Fool.
That's an exaggeration - probably. But the point still stands. Sunday pretends, but the weight of his anxiety in stillness settles heavily on Aventurine's shoulders, and every quiver of white wings gives away his discomfort. Aventurine, himself, finds he cannot help but steal glances when feathers ruffle.
It seems they each have a bad habit they need to get unter control.
Aventurine clears his throat as he climbs out of the shuttle, like the sound might snap Sunday out of that nervous trance he seems to be in. ]
Jarilo-VI is definitely an option...
[ Topaz's territory, not his, but infringing on her turf, while certainly suspicious, does not immediately point to him housing a fugitive. Just another instance of that famed Stoneheart squabbling that everyone likes to gossip about so much. It may also be a good way to loop her in on the scheme.
A plan worth considering, but one of many. There are benefits to other places, pros and cons to letting the bird pick or making the choice, himself. A sea of ideas to turn this way and that and study for possible dangers, but, at the moment, there are more immediately pressing matters. Sunday has that about-to-pluck-all-my-own-feathers look about him.
He walks around to the other side of the shuttle, closer to his traveling companion, and leans on the hood, arms crossed. ]
What's on your mind, Mister Sunday? Our cage isn't so bad, is it?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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You should think more of your own comfort and worry less about what I'm feeling. [ He shoves his hands into his pockets. ] No one is going to pay you the same courtesy out here.
[ Outside of the Sweet Dream, he means. Even on Penacony, where Sunday was more than a king, the people surrounding him had been manipulative -- well, all of them save his sister. It is no different out here. The sooner he learns that, the better.
Just as soon as he commits to the thought, though, he rolls his shoulders and gives a heavy sigh. Honesty. It's the only way. Any lies will stack up, higher and higher, until they all eventually topple, and the two of them don't even have the foundation to fake a house of cards. ]
Your hands are fine. It was just... a surprise. I don't exactly have a lot of experience with clergy. Aren't you sacred or something? I doubt you want someone like me looking at you, and- [ A huff. ] It's- it's really just, you don't want to be comforted, I can tell. And even if you did, I don't know how to do it. It seemed more effective to keep moving. [ When in doubt, maximize productivity. Focus on goals. ] Alright?
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...Mister Aventurine, I am not asking for comfort, nor am I acting out of concern for the comfort of strangers-- [At the moment anyway. He has acted out of concern for strangers many times. His life's work, the one thing he has made his core ambition, his entire reason to keep living, is to ensure the happiness of people he will never meet. His wings fold back, and he casts his gaze demurely toward the floor.]
Not just now, anyway. [He looks back up, his eyes sharper now.] I am asking out of concern for your comfort. If we are going to travel together, it makes sense to be aware of each other's emotional states. If I am incorrect about that, please let me know.
[There was one more point, one more absurd thing Aventurine said that should be addressed.] And I am stripped of my blessings now. My body is no more sacrosanct than yours. You are permitted to gaze upon me. It is leering I dislike. If I catch you doing that, I will castigate you.
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He pinches the bridge of his nose, barely registers Sunday's words until he starts speaking about gazes and leering. Aventurine blinks, hand falling to his side. There is the terrifying maestro who'd holed himself up in that oppressive little office in Dewlight Pavilion. Looking at him, Aventurine isn't sure what he feels -- fear, maybe, a jolt of something, certainly -- but what slips out of him is a snicker. His brows beetle, grin returning to his face. ]
Permitted to...? Spare the rod, Mister Sunday. You don't need to worry about me leering. Good instinct, though.
[ Aventurine can barely look at him -- fine features hidden behind the fluff of his hair, too expressive feathers always moving and giving him away -- without getting annoyed. All the same, he files that information away for later. Even without the halo, Sunday is jarringly handsome, and the ogling eyes of strangers will be unavoidable as they hop from world to world. Aventurine will have his work cut out for him, keeping unwanted attention at bay.
But, first things first. ]
Kind as it is for you to be so fussed with my comfort, right now, you're the one whose whole world has been turned upside down. [ Nevermind that he is still on leave, recovering from Harmony's brand, an Emanator's blade, and a walk through Nihility's sea. ] You don't trust me. That's to be expected. But it does complicate your concerns, you not believing half the things I say.
I'm not used to living in close quarters with someone else, let alone someone with our... shared history. It'll take some adjusting. There'll be plenty of little inconveniences. But, I... [ He doesn't quite wince, but a heaviness settles in his gaze as he stares into Sunday's face. The lines he's drawn between himself and Sunday are starting to take a more definitive shape. It feels like an elephant huddled in the back of his mind. A good thing Aventurine is good at ignoring things like that. ] ...setting aside the little things, I just don't want to see you shrink down, take up as little space as possible, and erase yourself because you think it'll make our lives easier. Okay?
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The rod? Oh, Mister Aventurine, I would never resort to such barbaric methods of retribution. More likely, I would tune you so that you never see again.
[The notes of laughter in his voice fade quickly, but remain in his eyes. His expression is amused, not mocking.] ....If you are sure you don't want me to keep to myself, then I won't. However, I think it would be in both of our interests to establish some boundaries when we return to the ship. For example, I know the door to your bed chamber is a threshold I must never cross. I would appreciate it if you returned the favor. We wouldn't want you coming down my ladder unannounced after all. What if you saw me without my boots on? You might catch a glimpse of my ankle.
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Though tuning is a threat Aventurine cannot take lightly, Sunday has allowed himself to be more than an inconvenience, stronger than the meek, injured animal. It is too great a victory to let his own nonsense ruin things. If they are to spend weeks together, better a companion unafraid to show his true colors than one who pretends to be nothing at all. Aventurine knows how that sort of thing usually goes. ]
Well, much as I love consequences for my actions, I'd hate to disrupt my poker game, so I better be on my best behavior.
[ He manages a laugh, easy, warm sound. ]
Most wise of you, Mister Sunday. Could you imagine if I walked in on you preening your feathers? I might faint, then we'd be in real trouble. [ Aventurine fishes a card out of his pocket and offers it out. ] Consider the room below deck your domain until I get you where you need to go. Take this, buy whatever feels right for an eclectic journey. I'm going to go get us a couple of coffees.
[ And that violin. ]
You'll be alright on your own, yeah?
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I'll be fine.
...I prefer my coffee [with heavy cream, plenty of sugar] black. [The Oak Family Head does not indulge in sweets. Even clipped of his wings, Sunday finds some old habits hard to shake.
Once he is left alone, Sunday wanders around the shop and other nearby storefronts, perusing clothes and travel sacks. He selects silk sleepwear, the one with too much chest exposed for his liking, and a fluffy bathrobe with matching slippers to cover himself with. In a store with cold-weather wear, he purchases a sleek, fur-lined coat that hangs to his ankles and complements his frame. White, with blue trim. Everything he buys is stylish. After all, necessity doesn't mean he can't look his best.
Warm weather clothing is more difficult for him. Shirts show much more skin than he is accustomed to. After some fussing, he finally settles on a short-sleeved top and loose linen trousers.
By the time Aventurine returns, he is standing on the side of the road, gripping multiple overstuffed bags. A few passersby give him lingering glances that he mistakes for ogling at first, then he realizes he must look like a wealthy tourist preparing for a pan-galactic cruise.]
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He takes his time, stopping at open air stalls they'd passed to browse wares and clear his head. It's a relief, he decides, that Sunday seems to be finding his footing. In lieu of something more cleanly cruel and monstrous, Aventurine will gladly take a bit of fire. Even if it does scare him more than the shrinking, injured bird he's been traveling with for the last day, poking a bear feels better than walking on eggshells. More real. (Not that he has any business wanting authenticity from anyone.)
It's a simple thing, popping into the music shop and procuring the violin. The merchant (husband of the woman who crafts most of the wooden pieces) recognizes him from their earlier stop. He clearly expects Aventurine to haggle, but he doesn't. However fine the instrument, the dent it puts in his bank account could be hammered out in one night at the right card table. He is, instead, generous with praise for the craftsmanship while the shopkeeper retrieves the piece and packs it into its case and wraps it all in brown paper, and laughs off a comment about the handsome young man he'd been by with earlier being "one lucky guy."
Next, the coffees. He orders from a spot he'd come to the first time he'd been to Lushaka. Back then, he'd been new to the Stonehearts, only recently inducted and unsure of how to behave himself in polite society. The little shop with the walk up window had been a reprieve. Still nicer than anything he'd ever experienced as a pit fighter, but a little more grounded in reality. The coffee is strong. The pastries better for being made in house. Aventurine purchases two cream puffs to go along with the two black coffees, and leisurely makes his way back, enjoying the feel of real sunlight baking his skin. (The bird probably needs sunscreen, he thinks off-handedly, when he notices what a warm day it is.)
When Sunday comes into view again, arms laden with bags from the shopping district's designer stores, Aventurine can't help but laugh. A bright bark of sound that he can't quite stifle with his own hands full. ]
I guess you really don't need my help to spend money.
[ He does a bit of juggling as he sidles up beside Sunday, large nondescript bag with the violin hoisted up onto one shoulder, coffees in carrier and pastries in paper sack moved over to one hand. He extends the other, open, to Sunday.
The delight at the sight of Sunday's many purchases is plain in his voice. ]
Slide some of those on my arm so you can take your drink, Mister Shopping Spree. Got us some pastries, too. The coffee's real strong, so I wanted something to balance it. Would you like to eat here on deck, or head back to my ship?
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The deck [He answers as he shifts the loops of his bags over Aventurine's arm. His now free hand accepts the coffee and he steps back with a grin that, this time, fails to reach his eyes.]
I would not mind looking out at the sea before we depart.
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He hoists the bags up onto his other shoulder and leads the way toward a spot he recalls being a fine place to sit and enjoy the scenery. They needn't walk far to find the intended destination -- the Hammer is dotted with little patches of green overlooking the endless blue. He brings them to a bench, wood planks set in carved coral overlooking the ocean, and shrugs the bags on his arm off onto the ground. ]
No one gave you too much fuss?
[ It's the closest he'll come to asking what's wrong outright. ]
cw: suicidal ideation
I'm fine. [He looks back at Aventurine with a sad smile.] I've read about oceans before, but I have never seen one. Now I am realizing there is so much I haven't seen.
[Once again, his gaze is pulled to the water. A horrible impulse stabs through him to run and leap from the side of the Hammer. It would correct many things that are currently wrong in the world. Since his sister, the Nameless, and even the IPC refuse to execute the greatest sinner of all, he could take on the burden himself. The Family has executed many sinners and heretics over the years in many ways. Drowning would do. In the black beneath the waves, everything would cease to matter, a major pawn would be removed from the game board of the Aeons, and the universe could wind on as if the creature named Sunday never existed.
It is a sweet, almost intoxicating thought. He hates himself now more than he has ever hated anyone. His own life feels like a terrible burden, a beautiful prize for sin that he doesn't deserve but must accept. ...And he wants to accept it. He wants to live. Despite everything, despite the immorality in his soul, he wants to live. Not just survive but one day truly live. That wish is exhilarating and terrifying.]
I want to live, Mister Aventurine. [He says softly.] I want to see more horizons like this one.
[Then, turning back to Aventurine, his grin warms and softens.]
On THEIR journey backward through time, Finality moved on either side of us and brought us together. I admit, I am not sure why, but... I think, even though I am afraid, I am excited...
[Maybe there has always been an ember within him, one he'd smothered throughout his adolescence, that looked skyward with longing.]
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Aventurine watches, wordless, as it happens. He thinks he can almost see the moment of epiphany. Sunday takes in the planet-spanning sea that surrounds them, finally puts himself in the moment and sees the specific sort of freedom that's stretched out before him. Robin was right. Penacony's fallen king was stymied by his throne, diverted from a chance at a better Path. Trailblaze does not exactly set Aventurine at ease. He cannot look at those who wander without a touch of jealousy and a heap of fear, but at least he knows now that Akivili's blessed aren't all cold, hungry conquerors.
Which sort will Sunday be in the end?
He supposes it doesn't matter. His own fears aside, so long as he can deliver the bird to the Express, it'll be better for everyone. He's mulling over their options when Sunday turns and bathes him in a sunrise smile he isn't quite prepared for and talk of Terminus and shared destinies. Aventurine stares back, surprise flickering across his features, something jolting beneath his sternum, pulling his attention to the brown paper bag in his hands. ]
I don't know much about the goals or motivations of destiny...
[ Taking care not to get any powdered sugar on his gloves or clothes, Aventurine retrieves one of the puff pastries wrapped in wax paper and a napkin. His eyes linger on the cream puff, unable to bear the combined weight Sunday's bright new hope and his ridiculous, romantic notions about fate. Fate never orchestrates things with kindness in mind.
Someone like Robin, like the Express crew, like a damned Masked Fool would've been better for Sunday in this moment. Anyone but him, incapable of looking ahead and seeing anything but an end point, revenge and then death.
His eyes flick up from the pastry in his hand to settle on Sunday. Sunday, who believes in paradise, who seems finally willing to let go enough to chase it. Stars, he's going to need all the help he can get. And sunscreen. Aventurine reminds himself to buy him some sunscreen. ]
I can promise you plenty of horizons, though, and time enough to see them.
[ Not moving from his spot on the bench, he holds out the cream puff. ]
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[Sunday glides back to the bench, sits, and takes a sip of the coffee. Bitter. He drinks anyway.]
On Penacony, I wanted to gather all Paths into myself and crush them into nothingness. Over their ruins I would have built my Path of Philosophy, a Path created by and for humankind...
[His eyes skirt downward and he lifts a hand to rest against his heart.]
As King of Humankind, as their scorching sun, I would have taken on the burden of choice and maintained paradise alone until the end of the cosmos. It...would have been beautiful.
[A glorious, golden world of peace and harmony, where the weak are cared for. His paradise. His promised land. A world he will mourn until the day he finally dies.
With a steadying breath, Sunday closes his eyes, then says...]
But... I don't think a worldbearer is what humanity wants. I think, maybe, they want a world traveler. Someone who can meet them as one of them, share their pain, and guide them to happiness. If I want to be that person, then I need wisdom, knowledge, and experience. Ascetism alone will not be enough.
[Finally, he lowers his hand from his chest and opens his eyes to meet Aventurine's gaze.]
I must see those distant horizons and unfamiliar stars... [He laughs slightly and plucks the offered cream puff from Aventurine's hand.]
Ah, oops. I'm rambling again. Forgive me, I've been thinking a lot. The sea helps...put matters into perspective. I am finally understanding some things that have been bothering me since my fall.
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But blessedly, he needn't pretend to be staunchly against the whole thing. Sunday has glimpsed the truth of things, or at least a piece of it. There's more to go, certainly, learning of humanity's penchant for sadness, for anger, for obstinance, for making no sense at all, but he's taking his first steps. (And Aventurine is thankful for that, because disagreeing with the man still feels a little like carrying a lit match into an abandoned mine.)
If anything, the surprise is in seeing him already committed to making the leap. ]
Wow. [ Aventurine leans back, crosses one leg over the other, and takes a sip of still hot coffee. He stares out at the water a moment before looking at Sunday once more, offering an impish grin. ] A risky endeavor, Mister Sunday. I'm impressed. Not surprised, but impressed.
[ Another drink, he drapes one arm over the back of the bench, away from Sunday. ]
I knew you had it in you.
[ The moment Robin tangled the two of them in the IPC's web, he'd known. She wouldn't've sent her brother out into a universe he could not handle. Sunday is more than the stone mannequins dotting Penacony's Grand Theater, not shattered by a fall. ]
You're going to grow callouses as you walk. Just remember not to let it all go rough. That perspective isn't the last one you'll gain. People are difficult and unpredictable. They teach you a lot. That's why they're fun.
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Difficult and unpredictable? [How strange to be told this after his many years as Bronze Melodia. This observation is why he had wanted to force predictability upon people, to grab them by the hand and pull them along his Path. What he'll need to learn isn't that such people exist, but how to guide them gently. How to show them happiness and encourage them to walk toward it on their own.
His wings flutter.]
Maybe traveling with the Aventurine of Strategems will teach me more about that. [In all the world, he cannot think of a single soul more frustrating than Aventurine. Fascinating and admirable. But also incredibly frustrating.]
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It's very silly. The bird is very silly. And he can't help but grin about it, right up until he recalls the decree about leering, ogling, and other lascivious behavior, and looks away to avoid his amusement being misinterpreted.
Aventurine focuses on the other tourists strolling through the park, starts to brainstorm the to-do list he'll need to address when they're back on the ship -- hide the violin, report to Jade, announce Sunday's intention to stay on the move until the Express reemerges, get that bed set up, sleep for an hour or two, maybe, and then-
Sunday's words reach him, and he laughs. ]
Jumping right in to hard mode, huh, Mister Sunday? You must really think yourself lucky.
[ Aventurine points a delighted grin at the man who, weeks ago, wanted him dead or worse. He cannot help but think of Harmony's brand, that unnecessary bit of extra, final justice imposed on him. Being the focus of Sunday's attention is more than a little terrifying, but then again, what would he even find, given the time to ferret up Aventurine's secrets?
Nothing. There's nothing. That's the whole point.
An amused sigh escapes him, and he takes another drink. ]
I hope you like what you find, Mister Sunday. And even if not, there are at least no end to lovely horizons out there. Enjoying the pastry?
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You are permitted to look at me. [Sunday reminds him with a warm chuckle.] Believe it or not, I do know when someone is leering instead of looking.
[It is a difficult thing to explain, but he recognizes it when it happens. On Penacony, most people stared. Tourists from afar usually hadn't met a Halovian before. Some ogled him, eyes dark with sinful lust. Some saw him as a work of art. Most were simply awestruck by his beauty. The artists were strange, but rarely immoral with their gazes. Even when they compared him to a statue, an objectifying comparison to make, they did so with rhapsodic praise. To them, he was not someone to be wooed, but a beauty to be honored. It was not ogling.
This isn't either.
Aventurine has only looked at him with eager curiosity so far, watching him and studying him, in an attempt to understand and predict his behavior. He's never felt anything lecherous in the Stoneheart's eyes. Maybe Aventurine understands. With his history, he must know what it is like to be stared at in a way that makes one feel like an object, a commodity. Less than human.
Sunday finishes the cream puff, washes it down with a sip of coffee, then turns his head to return the grin.]
Thank you. The pastry was quite good.
...Once you are done with your drink, we can return to your ship. Unless you had something else you needed to do here on Lushaka?
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[ It seems, for the moment, that the lion is sated. He'll see how it goes when they are in close quarters, again. A tin can floating in the sea of stars is much less soothing than sunshine on an endless sea. Aventurine takes another drink, sinking a little into his seat, giving himself permission to enjoy a much needed hit of caffeine while relaxing muscles that have been tensed for hours. ]
Sounds like a plan. Since we already know the Express isn't headed this way, there're better places to be.
[ Relaxed as he seems, his mind is abuzz with work. There's a whole brigade of P25s here, eager to impress someone of his rank, who could be recruited to keep tabs on the comings and goings of Family on the Hammer's Reef, but that might be too obvious. He considers erasing their docking data entirely before they leave, though falsifying records at this juncture feels like too great a risk for comparatively small reward. Best, then, to pretend nothing was odd about this visit. Just let Lushaka be what it is, a pitstop on the way to a greater journey.
The only question left is, what next?
Another drink. ]
Where would you like to go, Mister Sunday? Somewhere snowy? Plains or mountains? Civilized or remote?
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But he is not Bronze Melodia anymore, and he should get used to having preferences about things...and learning what those preferences are. Thinking about it always feels too overwhelming. Even without his wings, it helps to frame his future as a divine mission. A divine mission he can handle. Learning more about the man he sees in the mirror, however...]
Well, any of those places could be an important stop on my pilgrimage. [On civilized planets, he learns to understand the people, on remote ones, he learns suffering. After the warm light of Lushaka, maybe the snow would be best.]
...I have not seen the snow. I think it would help to know what people in frozen climates endure. [His smiling expression darkens as he tries not to think about the discomfort he will face, and how much he deserves it.]
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Snow, though, he can do snow.
In silence, he watches the point where Lushaka's glittering blue welcomes the clear, pale sky. A pall has settled over Sunday's demeanor, again. Aventurine takes another long drink of coffee before he addresses int. ]
What makes them happy.
[ A light amendment, stated softly. He turns in his seat, angles his whole body toward Sunday. ]
Wherever you go, you're going to find pain and hardship. You're going to see suffering. And you're going to see it straight away. You, specifically, I mean, not a generic "you." You're sensitive to that sort of thing, right?
People thrive in those places, too, though. There's joy and faith and love, even in the roughest frontier. If you're going to peddle happiness...
[ Aventurine fishes his own cream puff out of the bag, holding it daintily between his fingers, still mindful of the powdered sugar. ]
...You need to learn what makes the people happy. Not just what they endure.
[ He pops the cream puff into his mouth, one bite, no reservations about seeming crass. The powdered sugar shaken loose is quickly attended to, though, patted off with a napkin right away while he chews. ]
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[Some of the warmth returns to his face as he gazes out at the sea to watch the birds loop and dive from the sky into the waves.]
I need to learn what makes the hardships worth enduring.
[Because there must be something. Beneath the struggle, the aching grind of life is a spark that drives people forward. On Penacony, that spark was lost long ago, consumed by the Stellaron. He wants to see that spark.
He wants to believe in the strength of human will as much as the Nameless do.
His silver wings fold back as he chuckles.]
You are wiser than you are given credit for, Mister Aventurine.
[Finally, he lifts his head to regard his companion, and the warm smile dissolves at the sight of an entire cream puff disappearing in one bite.]
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He doesn't have time to feel any particular way about that, though. Sunday's expression blanks at the sight of him, chipmunk-cheeked, devouring a pastry, and he barely has time enough to cover his mouth before he starts laughing. Of course Sunday, gifted all the time in the world to be as Orderly as possible, is not prepared for the eating habits of a corporate drone. Oh, he is in for such a rude awakening.
Just in time, Aventurine presses his forearm to his face, catching a laugh, sealing his mouth and nose as he almost chokes on cream and sugar. The bright sound threatening to spill out thrums deep in his chest and high in his throat, instead, a humming, violin sound as he swallows laughter and tries not to cough.
He lets his stifled giggles peter out before he finishes chewing, and does not speak until he's swallowed the pastry. ]
Sorry to make you regret that very nice compliment so quickly, Feathers. [ Aventurine wheezes, delight plain, before he takes a swig of still hot coffee. He smiles, though, big and bright. His cup is nearly empty, so he scoops up a few of the bags he'd set down on the bench beside him and stands. ] Let's head back, before you really start to regret your choice in chauffeur.
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A long journey awaits him, and he is eager to see what happens next. If he can push past the anxious knot he feels whenever he thinks about his lack of control, this journey could be fun.
Fun... as long as he keeps one step ahead of The Family. If they don't kill him for his heresy, they will use him to hurt Robin. He knows what powerful tuners can do. None of his thoughts would be safe. She wouldn't be safe. Aventurine wouldn't be safe.
The excitement of a journey sinks beneath a whirl of anxiety. His mind latches onto the worry as something familiar, a lifeline in the confusing world he finds himself in, and his wings tense.
He draws a breath, prepares himself to ask if Aventurine is prepared to kill him to keep him out of The Family's hands.
Why are you constantly fantasizing about this man killing you? he inwardly scolds himself. What is your problem?
Stop it!
Sunday releases the tension in a shuddered sigh and smiles.]
If I have regrets, they will not be because of you, Mister Aventurine.... That said, yes, let's return to the ship.
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Aventurine's gaze lingers on Sunday's once more, expression betraying nothing. Reductive, to call it travel jitters. All the same, he's not sure there's any good way of addressing it, so he gathers up bags onto his arms and leads the way back the way they'd come, through the Hammer's market district and the IPC's main office.
He makes light conversation to fill silence and avoid thinking about regret and distress, mostly about local landmarks or how he understands Lushakan city ships function, as they load up the sleek black shuttle and disembark. A perhaps surprisingly small package is waiting for them when they return to the ship, a sturdy little crate, no bigger than a family-sized pizza delivery, is anchored to the cargo door. Aventurine pushes a few buttons to open the ship's hatch, and the package rockets itself inside. The shuttle follows in after it, settling into place in silence. ]
That's going to be heavier than it looks. [ He says, meaning the space delivery. ] A whole mattress, pillows, blankets, everything, vacuum-sealed down to a carryable size. Let me help you get it down into your room.
[ Odd, to call it his room. Aventurine's fingers linger a moment on his safety harness before unhooking it. No, not odd. Just a calculated move to make the bird feel more comfortable in his temporary quarters.
The shuttle opens once the cargo bay is sealed. Aventurine does not rush to climb out this time. ]
Last thing we need is you throwing your back out, right? First, though, I'd like to plot a course to our next stop. We're better off not hanging out too long in the place everyone thinks the Express was going.
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It is difficult to accept, almost impossible, no matter how hard he tries to still his mind.
When the shuttle stops in the cargo bay, he is the one who rushes to climb out. Maybe a quick stretch and a comfortable flex of his wings will quiet the worried spiral he's been in since sitting on the bench in Lushaka. That brief moment of joyous excitement at the thought of a journey had been fun before his own anxious nature brought it crashing down and forced it into a more painful but familiar and easily understood shape.
It takes a moment for him to notice Aventurine is speaking. He glances over after another pretty stretch and flutters his wings.]
Where will our next stop be? Snowland? Jarilo-Six? I heard the Nameless stopped there already so I doubt anyone suspects they'll show up there again.
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That's an exaggeration - probably. But the point still stands. Sunday pretends, but the weight of his anxiety in stillness settles heavily on Aventurine's shoulders, and every quiver of white wings gives away his discomfort. Aventurine, himself, finds he cannot help but steal glances when feathers ruffle.
It seems they each have a bad habit they need to get unter control.
Aventurine clears his throat as he climbs out of the shuttle, like the sound might snap Sunday out of that nervous trance he seems to be in. ]
Jarilo-VI is definitely an option...
[ Topaz's territory, not his, but infringing on her turf, while certainly suspicious, does not immediately point to him housing a fugitive. Just another instance of that famed Stoneheart squabbling that everyone likes to gossip about so much. It may also be a good way to loop her in on the scheme.
A plan worth considering, but one of many. There are benefits to other places, pros and cons to letting the bird pick or making the choice, himself. A sea of ideas to turn this way and that and study for possible dangers, but, at the moment, there are more immediately pressing matters. Sunday has that about-to-pluck-all-my-own-feathers look about him.
He walks around to the other side of the shuttle, closer to his traveling companion, and leans on the hood, arms crossed. ]
What's on your mind, Mister Sunday? Our cage isn't so bad, is it?
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cw: uh
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cw: suicidal ideation (sort of)
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not entirely worksafe
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nsfw a bit
also a tiny bit nsfw but also mostly just sad
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yeah this is nsfw lmao
still nsfw
still nsfw
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nsfw
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nsfw a bit
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